The sign says, Dallas: 252 miles. We’re leaving Amarillo and The 806 behind us for now. Outside my passenger window the scenery has been mostly vast open Texas plains, at times stretching out like an ocean into the horizon. The islands of civilization we occasionally come upon have no shortage of coffee, ice tea, or friendly smiles, making our trip down 30 south a one.
Yesterday was day one of our ten day tour through Texas for SXSW. We left Boulder on Thursday morning, and had a beautiful drive all the way to Amarillo. As it turns out, yesterday was a travel day for two Colorado bands–Statue of Liberty and Chimney Choir. We both traveled to Amarillo, TX to perform at The 806–a great place to play for an exceptional crowd of people who support live music.
It was an unusually chilly night for Amarillo, and the locals let us know it, promising that the upcoming days would be much more pleasant. Undeterred by the weather’s mood, and with beer in our glasses and our twinkle lights twinkling, we opened the night of music. The crowd continued to grow throughout the night, and our reception at The 806 was once again, warm and welcoming. To wrap up the evening, there was Chimney Choir–an incredible band of three talented musical gypsies from Denver. If you have not heard them perform, I strongly suggest you check them out; you won’t be disappointed.
Fittingly enough–in what we’ve experienced to be the true serendipitous spirit of Amarillo (I recall the last time we played The 806 and made friends with two men from Sweden that happened to be staying at the same place we were)–Chimney Choir and Statue of Liberty have the same destination once again, as we both travel further south to Dallas. In fact once there, they will be performing at two venues we’re also playing–however, this time not on the same nights. Bizarre, but how cool!
As I sit here in the car, looking over my writing, wondering if its good, just okay, or worth reading at all, I remember of the basic point I wanted to make in this particular blog–to say, “Thank You.”
In an attempt to keep my new year goal of being more grateful, I would like to take advantage of my blog as a tool for expressing said gratitude. Today my appreciation is being directed toward you lovelies. To all the fans and friends who have contributed to our Kickstarter project and the upcoming album, The Radiant Life, we say, “Thank you!” Only three days ago we launched our “Radiant Life Rocket” to see what kind of power it was capable of. Already, only three days into it’s 30 day journey, its 25% of the way to it’s goal! But who knows– at this rate we could reach the moon!
It’s power has less to do with us, and much much more to do with you–our readers, fans and backers. Without you, our creative accomplishments and future goals would have little “fuel in the rocket boosters,” if you will. Bob and I are so grateful to all of you and will continue to be so. Thank you for not only allowing us the opportunity to create and share what’s in our hearts with you, but for listening to what we have to say through our music. At times, this project has been hard, exhausting, and stressful, but also exhilarating and fulfilling, and has taken me to places I would never have predicted–both literally and metaphorically speaking. I have learned more about myself in the last six months than the last six years.
Being somewhat of a perfectionist, I’ve struggled with accepting my skills, musical and otherwise, for what they are, where they are, and try to focus on moving forward. When starting this project, and for months into it, even still to this day…I entertain(ed) classic self-defeatist thoughts and wonder if I have anything worth bringing to the creative table–or if I am even capable of participating in this project at the level that I’ve deemed necessary for success? The answer to all this is, of course I am, and that may be the hardest truth I’ve struggled to embrace. I am capable of incredible creativity and ingenuity because I am; we all are. Trying to realize and honestly accept that I am capable of literally anything, is hard and scary. I think we all struggle to embrace our power and potential, or should I say our potential power–it’s way easier not to. It’s much simpler to go on believing that we have acquired all the skills we need or are necessary to live happily for the rest of our lives. It let’s us off the hook. Then we can tell ourselves and believe that we are doing the best we can with our lives, and no further effort is needed. I don’t mean to imply that people consciously decide to stop growing and learning, or that we deliberately limit ourselves just out of laziness. I think the task of self-reflection and being honest with yourself about what you want to do with you life, if you’re doing it, how you can be doing it better, on and on it goes… it’s intimidating, and seemingly insurmountable! It requires a lot of diligent work, time, effort, and can be painful. And not only that, it constantly needs to be tended to. The book that inspired the album, The Radiant Life, talks about clearing your garden, or your mind, to make room for new growth. It tells about the importance of removing from our minds false beliefs that we hold on to and sometimes even protect! It’s amazing how much effort we as people, can exert resisting change, or resisting the thought that we could be wrong. Just like digging out deep-rooted weeds that have been ignored too long, and have now grown out of control and threaten to kill the fruit that was originally planted and intended to thrive, removing false beliefs from our psyche is a dirty, hard, time-consuming and often painful job. I’m no expert either! Just as soon as I think I’m in good shape–doing a good job of clearing the garden, being honest and authentic and accepting–I fall back to my more familiar insecurity and self-doubt. Unfortunately my ‘inner-critic’ is still well-armed for defeating such self-empowerment, but I’m working on evicting that critic to make some room for a kinder, gentler inner-voice. It’s a constant struggle for me, but I believe it’s worth the fight.
Even though it may not seem it, this is a happy story–because at the end of the day, at the end of the song, the blog, or the trip, I have been given the opportunity to say, “yes” to my dream–this dream I am living. It is possible because of the love and support of all of YOU. Who knew such self-discovery would be such a large part of this project? Not this girl, who thought she had it all figured out.
Thank you for reading, thank you for pledging, thank you for being a part of this story. You guys rock.